I can’t go to bed without my skincare routine. Or my pillow. And often, some sort of mindful meditation in the dark. Oh, and a kiss goodnight from my husband. Who, as it happens, needs to be in bed with me, or else we both have a really tough time falling asleep.
Anyone want to tell me that I have to stop these terrible habits?
Are these crutches that I need to work on removing for my own good?
The answer is no. These are all completely reasonable and healthy sleep associations. And yet, we expect children to go to sleep independently, with no associations to speak of.
Nursing to sleep? 𝘍𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘦.
Is motion soothing? 𝘉𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘳𝘰𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵’𝘴 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦.
Need mom to stay in the room? 𝘋𝘰 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘥 𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘤𝘬𝘴.
Checking in creating more difficulty? 𝘉𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘭 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯.
We have cultivated a society that sets highly unrealistic expectations: for babies, for school aged kids, for adults.
It’s time we collectively support parents to trust their instincts, and leave behind the garbage that is sleep training.
Because that’s what this type of advice is: garbage. Sleep associations are not negative. They are not crutches or bad habits. There is absolutely zero evidence to suggest any such associations are in any way detrimental or harmful.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again –
If feeding to sleep works for you and your child – 𝗴𝗼 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗶𝘁.
If rocking, bouncing or holding works for you and your child – 𝗴𝗼 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗶𝘁.
If shushing, patting, holding hands or otherwise supporting works for you and your child – 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂.
You don’t need to change what’s working today out of fear of what may come tomorrow.
👉🏽 Let’s normalize sleep associations! So tell me below – what are YOUR sleep associations?
Learn more: https://www.instagram.com/p/CT-S8m7Fqiy/